There is a nuance to the miracle of Jesus walking on water that you may have missed. Any of the apostles could have walked with Jesus on the water. It was optional to join Him. Yet, of all those in the boat only Peter even dared to have faith and come walk on water with Jesus.
Matthew 14:28 And Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.”
Peter faltered because he was afraid when he saw the wind but he was not a failure. What Peter did that night during the fourth watch was beautiful and maybe, just maybe, Peter did it for me. Jesus didn’t command anyone until Peter asked to be commanded to walk with him. It takes courage to reach out to Jesus like that. I’m ready to face my own fears and do something optional.
1 Corinthians 7:25 …I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy.
The above verse shows us that what proceeds it is not required as a Christian but is trustworthy advice. Verse twenty-seven has waited in the back of my mind for years, awakening recently to challenge me to embrace the trustworthy advice of apostle Paul.
1 Corinthians 7:27 Are you pledged to a woman? Do not seek to be released. Are you free from such a commitment? Do not look for a wife.
This article is my spiritual declaration to not look for a wife.
For many years, I have held a well-meaning belief within myself that goes like this “If I am not brave enough to say Hello to a woman I can not expect to find a partner.” It is a paradigm of personal responsibility that I adapted in opposition to a paradigm of serendipity and passivity. I saw it as my role to sweep a woman off her feet. Each of my past relationships were “earned” through first working up the courage to say “Hello” to a woman I fancied.
At the library, in an airport, at parks, bookstores, comic-cons, cafes, etc. I love the challenge of breaking social norms by romancing a stranger somewhere unexpected. I am thrilled by how challenging it is – the risk of rejection, the self-development required to make a good first impression, the reward of a beautiful woman’s interest and time.
I don’t think I need to “give up” on this skill at all. Interpreting the Bible requires that we use our minds to discern nuances and apply wisdom and patient consideration. If I am in a cafe and see a gorgeous woman I will continue to walk up and say “Hello” but I will do it with the intention of friendship instead of with the goal of dating her. In that way I will honor Scripture by not looking for a wife but I will still enjoy the game of meeting someone new.
I want to grow beyond only talking to women and use this skill of talking to strangers to serve the Lord. I don’t know what that will look like but the most salient example may be showing kindness and interest to someone who needs it the most. Sometimes talking to a stranger can be more fulfilling than to a close friend. Have you ever felt more able to be vulnerable with someone you don’t know well in a certain topic? There is a comfort in knowing that you will never see them again. I will look for opportunities to spread the peace and light of Christ to people I would not consider dating. In this way I will use my natural talents to serve the Lord.
For many, not looking for love seems natural and obvious. It may be that this act of trust is uniquely challenging only for me. That’s alright and I trust you have your own water on which to walk. We all have our crosses to bear. It is time for me to walk out in Faith and trust the Lord to show me further understanding. I hope this article has genuinely challenged you to seek love from the Lord more diligently and to focus less on projecting your needs upon others.
Go, find your water and step out in Faith.
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